Hodjanernes Blog

5 februar 2009

Mars Bar – nu med chokoladeperler!

Filed under: Blogs Foreign English, Immigration, Islam, UK — Tags: — Skjoldungen @ 23:35

Noget til Café-Latte segmentets gode smag? – Jeg holder mig  nu til varianten med bacon-smag.

marsgrissebasseDaily Mail: Fifteen illegal immigrants were arrested yesterday after they were found hiding in a lorry filled with around 20 tons of cocoa powder.

The stowaways had climbed into the tanker as it left Amsterdam on its way to a Mars factory in Slough.But police were alerted after the driver of the 37-ton vehicle prepared to unload his cargo. A factory worker, who asked not to be named, said: ‘Soon after the tanker arrived at the factory, the driver got on top of it to open up the hatches on the roof. ‘When the driver looked down through the hatches into the tank, he apparently saw lots of men in brown coloured clothes –all saturated with the powder.

‘Goodness knows how they managed to breathe because the powder is very fine and would have been in the air. The tanker was about half full of chocolate powder – the usual maximum load, so there would have been room for 15 men to ride on top of it.’ – He joked: ‘Clearly the group of stowaways were in search of the sweet life – and they took the phrase quite literally when they boarded the truck.’ – The immigrants are believed to be aged between 20 and 40 and of Middle Eastern origin. Paramedics were called to the plant but none of the men needed treatment. – A police spokesman confirmed all were unhurt but were coughing and spluttering from the powder as they were put into waiting police vans at the Slough Trading Estate. The Hungarian driver was also arrested, but it was not clear if he had been aware of his illegal cargo. – The stowaways were due to be interviewed by immigration service officials last night. – Staff at the Mars factory –where Mars Bars, Snickers, Twix and M&M‘s are produced –declined to comment on the incident.

31 januar 2009

Perlesøm.

Filed under: Blogs Foreign English, Humor, Immigration, Islam, Jihad, Terrorism, UK — Tags: — Skjoldungen @ 13:13

Den engelske arbejdsulykkesforsikring vil forsørge knaldperle de næste 18 år.

Nick Reilly, en engelsk kunstig perle som konverterede til Fredens Religion™ under navnet  Mohammad Rashid Saeed Alim, besluttede sidste år at give de vantro en lærestreg. Under kyndig vejledning af sine nye, fromme trosfæller fremstillede han en bombe, tog bussen til byen og gik ind på en restaurant fyldt med mennesker.

Problemet opstod, da han skulle montere tændsatsen og derfor gik ud på toilettet. Han var nemlig nu blevet så muslimsk i hovedet at han ikke kunne finde ud af at låse toiletdøren op indefra inden bomben sprang og sårede ham alvorligt med alle de søm den indeholdt.

Som et lille plaster på såret vil han nu blive forsørget – i et perleskrin ved navn ‘HM Prison Service’ – de næste 18 år – på skatteborgernes regning.

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Flamberet perle.

Ny arbejdsulykke i Gaza: Hvad er der med pestilensere og teknik?

gazan_torchedEn perlefotograf skulle forevige en af de daglige afbrændinger af israelske og amerikanske flag (hvorfor har de glemt os?). Med det for perler vanlige håndelag og snilde lykkedes det ham at blive overhældt med brændende benzin – på hvilken der åbenbart ikke hersker nogen mangel på de kanter. Hr.Abdul Rahman Al-Khatib fik dog kun middelsvære forbrændinger, idet perlekæden udenom fik hans perlehumør kølet lidt ned.

27 januar 2009

Sprogperler.

We’ve got mail too – men Pat Condell har en fin samling på ny-engelsk.

pat_-condellDog forekommer det os, at perlernes valg af europæisk sprog er af underordnet betydning. Men selvfølgelig, Københavns politidirektør, Samarbejds-Politiken, DanMarx Radio og andre vogtere af den gode tone kan måske finde nuancer i yndefuldheden:

* ur just a ignornat whtie son of a bitch that needs to b bheaded wid a blunt knife
* i don’t care about religioists. i know where you live and i’m coming to shove a coke bottle up your old pathetic ass and rape all the women of your family. i can’t believe i pay taxed for old impotent farts like you. satan bless ameri-fuck-ca.
* i cannot fucking wait until you die (which will be probably soon) and stand before your creator. I bet that would scare ur little gay accent right out of you. I am 100% sure ur gay. Just by the way u look.
* why don’t you kill yourself white bastard? or do you want me to do it? – do you have a white daughter to rape and molest? or are you scared your number is decreasing you redneck?
* fuck u !! and fuck all the zionist christian and atheist like u ! u are an ignorant mother fucker extremist ! u are a terrorist old man! u are a son of a bitch ! fuck u and fuck every body loves u ! if i see u in the streets i swear i am going to cut ur head off
* Fuck you old bastard watch out buddy cause am coming we have lots of people where you live jihad is declared on you bitch you dont ever insult islam or prophet muhammad(pbuh) sorry old bastard but i hope you had a fun time on earth cause your going to hell with the christians jews and athiest
* u son of a hoe ur mama shouldve aborted u when u were in her womb,if she hadnt and i waz alive dat time i would punched her right dere so u couldve died… FUCK UUUUUUU!!!!!
* I will kill you.
* Fuck you bitch, go fuck your mom in the ass before she commits suicide due to the lack of drugs she has had the past few days.Your country is corrupt fucking shit! Amreica is run by Jew and homosexuals!! FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!
* oi you fucker, i thought i told you to tell me where you live in london! im also from london and i cant wait to crack your skull open with a hammer.but im going 2 do it slowly, i want you to feel the pain. and if im in a good mood, i’d like 2 chop a couple of your limbs, fry them and then make you eat them. maybe burn your face to finish the show. give me your address, my boys will pick you up…
* u mother fucking white bastard i know where you live in london, you’ll be dead in 3 weeks. Muslims will take over the world inshallah. when your all dead you will wake up and realise the truth.
* HITLER GOT THE WRONG PEOPLE, HE SHOULD HAVE CAME FOR YOU ATHEIST BASTARDS FIRST
* suck my cock u jew if i saw you i would shoot u if i saw u on the streets and put ur head on my wall u fucking dick
* IF I FIND YOUR UGLY FACE IM GONNA SMASH IT OFF WITH A MACHETE OK
* IF I SEE YU IN PUBLIC I WILL NIFE U .IF U DONT START TAKING DOWN THESE ANTI ISLAM VIDEOS I WILL BE SENDING YOUR PICTURE TO ALL MY BROTHERS IN LONDON (ABOUT 1000 OF THEM) AND THEY WILL DO THE SAME AND YOU WILL HAVE WISHED THAT U WERE NOT EVEN BORN, YOU HAVE 2 HOURS STARTING FROM WHEN YOU SEE THIS MESSAGE ALLAH HU AKBAR
* STUPID BRITISH FUCK U ARE JUST MAD BECAUSE ISLAM IS TAKING OVER AND WE ARE GOING TO WHIPE U ATHEISTS CHRISTIANS AND JEWS OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH INSHALLAH
* U ARE A BARSTARD. U FUCKING FOUR EYED WHITE HONKIE MONSTER. IM GNA RIP UR FUCKING HEAD AND LED YOU DIE SLOWLY. 1 WARNING THOUGH NO NEED FOR ME COZ I CAN PROMISE U DAT IN THE NEST 3 DAYS U WILL EXPERIENCE THE WORST PAIN EVER AND DAT WILL BE PAIN FROM HELLL U FUCKING RETARDED WHITE HONKIE BARSTARD WHO NEEDS TO BE KILLED
* YOU WHITE BASTARD JUST GO FUCK YOUR MUM YOU MOTHER FUCKER ILL FUCKING KILL YOU BASTARD YOU CUNT YOU EVIL BASTARD YOY DONT EVEN KNOW THE FUCKING RELIGION U WHITE BASTARD cunt cunt cunt cunt
* OK FAGGOT..im going to KICK YOUR ASS YOU FUCK HEAD IM GONNA KICK UR FAIRY ASS AND CASTRATE YOU AND CURB STOMP YOU YOU FAIRY FUCK. BURN IN HELL YOU MOTHERFUCKER YOU SHOULD GO CUT YOUR WRISTS AND SHOVE A CHAINSAW UP YOUR ASS YOU FUCKING FAG.. JESUS ISNT GAY.. HES STRAIGHTER THAN YOU.

Hat tip: Antisalafisten.

26 januar 2009

Perlemode

Filed under: Islam, Tørklæde — Tags: , — Hodja @ 08:00

perlemode21

Kirsten Damgaard, kulturpsykolog.

24 januar 2009

Perler

Filed under: Billeder/Pictures, Danmark, Humor, Indvandring, Islam, Muslim World — Tags: — Skjoldungen @ 01:41

Perletiets perlistisk perlefekte perlør

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